The Wild Reed: From the Palliative/Spiritual Care Bookself

Sunday, August 02, 2020

From the Palliative/Spiritual Care Bookself

I continue today my series that draws from the wisdom within the many books on my shelf at work. As most reading this would know, my “work,” since September 2018, is that of a palliative care interfaith chaplain at a hospital just north of the Twin Cities.

In this fourth installment I share an excerpt from Jean Shinoda Bolen’s book, Close to the Bone: Life Threatening Illness and the Search for Meaning, about which acclaimed author Isabel Allende writes: “This is the book I needed when my daughter was sick. It would have helped me through it, like a map of the underworld. Myths, stories, prayer, touching, visualization, rituals, and especially love, are some of the tools and wisdom that this extraordinary book gives us.”

(NOTE: To start at the beginning of this series, click here.)

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The Chinese pictograph for crisis is comprised of the ideograms for “danger” and “opportunity.” Every life-threatening illness is a major crisis for everyone concerned that shakes the foundations of previous assumptions. Such a crisis is not restricted to the person with the illness, nor is it just about the fate of the body.

A life-threatening condition throws all aspects of life for the patient and all significant relationships into a time of turmoil and transition. Life-threatening illness is a crisis for the soul.

When death and disability come close, it is indeed a time of danger and opportunity, which raises questions about the meaning of life and tests the bonds of relationships.

. . . Illness [can be understood] as a descent of the soul into the underworld and the healing that can result. . . . I have accompanied family members, friends, and patients through illnesses and hospitalizations that were descents into the underworld. The terrain is very familiar, though the gateway of physical illness is not as familiar as the psychological entry points that bring people on a soul path into a Jungian analysis with me.

Whether the life-threatening illness is psychological or physical, when depression colors or influences thought and action, people often give up on themselves and on the future. It is then not enough to treat a depression only with medications, or only pay attention to the physical signs and symptoms of disease, when giving up on life having any meaning, now or in the future, is the underlying life-or-death issue.

. . . A life-threatening illness has the impact of a stone hitting the still surface of a lake, sending concentric rings of disturbance out, as feelings, thoughts, and reactions radiate out from this center. It impacts relationships, it stirs the depths of others, it potentially brings the patient and those who are affected “close to the bone,” into the proximity of the soul. Soul questions arise about the meaning of life when the mind is ill or the body is ailing. Healing and recovery may depend as much or more upon a deepening of relationships and connection to one’s own soul and spiritual life, as on medical or psychiatric expertise.

I have learned over and over again that a life-threatening illness is soul-shaking for everyone involved, that it provides us an opportunity to get intimations and intuitions about why we are here, and what and who really matters.