Monday, September 28, 2009

Shirtless Guy Offers Survival Tips for Gay Catholics

Okay, here’s something novel: a cute shirtless guy sharing “survival tips” on the Internet for those of us who are Catholic and gay!

Some friends recently alerted me to this particular guy and his series of videos - and jokingly suggested that I start making similar ones for The Wild Reed! Hmm, I don’t think so. Mind you, it would certainly be an incentive to get into shape.

Anyway, the very much in-shape guy who is making a series of interesting and, well, let’s be honest, visually appealing videos, goes by the name of Davey Wavey.

Although Davey no longer identifies as Catholic, he nevertheless experienced (“survived,” as he says) both Catholic high school and university. In offering a number of survival tips for young people who are gay and Catholic, Davey also draws on Gregory Gerald’s In Jupiter’s Shadow, a “memoir/mystery” that “chronicles a religious boy’s struggle with forbidden attraction.”

As I’m sure you’d agree, most of these “tips” could apply to anyone, regardless of denomination. Here are a few of them that I particularly appreciate:

Remember that where there is love there is God, and it doesn’t matter with whom that consensual love is shared.

Call in sick the day they talk about the “sin” of masturbation.

Sublimate your “Catholic guilt” with regular exercise.

Remember that all the rules, all the laws, and all the regulations were written by people, and that people have a pretty good track record for lapses of judgment.

Internalize only those teachings that ring true in your heart. You don’t need to believe something just because a man in a robe tells you it’s true. Think for yourself.

Read the David and Jonathan story in the Bible (1 Samuel: 18). And if ever you’re doubting yourself, read it again because those two were so doing it.

As you get older, and if you want to stay Catholic, try to find a more progressive Catholic church in your area.

Go to and read the publication, What the Bible Does and Doesn’t Say About Homosexuality.

Trust God enough to accept yourself as you were created to be. And, yes, this takes guts and you’ll have to go out on a limb, but God will be out on that limb with you.

Know that our good friend Jesus never said one word about same-sex relationships.

Realize that loving yourself isn’t a sin. It’s respecting the creation that God made, which is you.

To read a number of responses to his “survival guide” for gay Catholics, visit this page on Davey Wavey’s website.

Recommended Off-site Links:
Break the Illusion – Davey Wavey’s website.
Davey Wavey’s Coming Out Story
In Jupiter’s Shadow - The official website.

And here are some related Wild Reed posts. (Think of them as my words of hope and advice for gay Catholics!):
Be Not Afraid, You Can Be Happy and Gay
A Catholic Presence at Gay Pride (2009)
A Catholic Presence at Gay Pride (2008)
Inclusive Catholics Celebrate Gay Pride
Gay Pride as a Christian Event
Trusting God’s Generous Invitation
Choosing to Stay
Celebrating Our Sanctifying Truth
Listen Up, Papa!
No Stranger Am I
Our Catholic “Stonewall Moment”
Gay People and the Spiritual Life
The Gifts of Homosexuality
Catholic and Gay in the UK
A Catholic Rebellion?
The Catholic Church and Gays: An Excellent Overview
Catholic Teaching on Homosexuality: Complex and Nuanced
Reflections on the Primacy of Conscience
The Question of an “Informed” Catholic Conscience
Jesus and the Centurion (Part 1)
Jesus and the Centurion (Part 2)
Tips for Thinking Catholics
What It Means To Be Catholic
“More Lovely Than the Dawn”: God as Divine Lover
Getting It Right
God is Love

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