A spiritual resource that many of my Christian patients find particularly meaningful is Sarah Young’s devotional, Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence. It’s a collection of daily reflections written as if Jesus himself is speaking directly to us. They are words of encouragement, comfort, and reassurance based on Jesus’ own words of hope, guidance, and peace found in Scripture.
I share this evening a favorite reading of mine from Jesus Calling, one that is inspired by Colossians 1:16, 1 Kings 19:12, and Psalm 5:3.
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Wait quietly in my Presence while My thoughts form silently in the depths of your being. Do not try to rush this process, because hurry keeps your heart earthbound. I am the Creator of the entire universe, yet I choose to make My humble home in your heart. It is there where you know Me most intimately; it is there where I speak to you in holy whispers. Ask My Spirit to quiet your mind so that you can hear My still small voice within you. I am speaking to you continually: words of Life . . . Peace . . . Love. Tune your heart to receive these messages of abundant blessing. Lay your requests before Me, and wait in expectation.
As you’ll see and hear, both the reading from A Course in Miracles and the lyrics of Tina’s song share a number of spiritual insights and truths.
I should note that the original Course in Miracles text uses the metaphor of father for the Divine Presence. I prefer and use the metaphor of lover as expressed in the phrase “Beloved One.” As with the previous adaptations I’ve shared (see here, here and here), if this one resonates with you, feel free to make it even more meaningful by using your preferred images and words: “God,” “Allah,” “Lord,” “Jesus,” “Holy One,” “Mother.” . . . I trust that they all serve as different pathways leading up the same holy mountain or, to use another metaphor, different gateways leading inwards to our center, the deepest part of which we all share. For as Henri Nouwen so beautifully reminds us: “In the depths of my being, I meet my fellow humans with whom I share [all things].”
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Let me remember I am one with God.
Today let us give thanks for our Identity in God, the Beloved One of our Soul. Our home is safe, protection guaranteed in all we do, power and strength available to us in all our undertakings. We can fail in nothing. Everything we touch takes on a shining light that blesses and that heals. At one with the Beloved and with the universe we go our way rejoicing, with the thought that the Beloved goes everywhere with us.
How holy are our minds! And everything we see reflects the holiness within the mind at one with God and with itself. How easily do errors disappear, and death give place to everlasting life. Our shining footprints point the way to truth, for the Beloved One is our Companion as we walk the world a little while. And those who come to follow us will recognize the way because the light we carry stays behind, yet still remains with us as we walk on.
What we receive is our eternal gift to those who follow after, and to those who went before or stayed with us a while. And the Beloved One, Who loves us with the equal love in which we were created, smiles on us and offers us the happiness we gave.
Today we will not doubt His Love for us, nor question His protection and His care. No meaningless anxieties can come between our faith and our awareness of the Beloved’s Presence. We are one with Him today in recognition and rememberance. We feel the Beloved in our hearts. Our minds contain His Thoughts; our eyes behold His loveliness in all we look upon. Today we see only the loving and the lovable.
We see it in appearances of pain, and pain gives way to peace. We see it in the frantic, in the sad and the distressed, the lonely and afraid, who are restored to the tranquility and peace of mind in which they were created. And we see it in the dying and the dead as well, restoring them to life. All this we see because we saw it first within ourselves.
No miracle can ever be denied to those who know that they are one with God. No thought of theirs but has the power to heal all forms of suffering in anyone, in times gone by and times as yet to come, as easily as in the ones who walk beside them now. Their thoughts are timeless, and apart from distance as apart from time.
We join in this awareness as we say that we are one with the Beloved. For in these words we say as well that we are saved and healed; that we can save and heal accordingly. We have accepted, and we now would give. . . . Today we would experience ourselves at one with the Beloved, so that the world may share our recognition of reality. In our experience the world is freed. As we deny our separation from the Beloved One, the world is healed along with us.
Peace be to you today. Secure your peace by practicing awareness you are one with your Creator, as He is with you. Sometime today, whenever it seems best, devote a half-an-hour to the thought that you are one with God. This is our first attempt at an extended period for which we give no rules nor special words to guide your meditation. We will trust God’s Voice to speak as He sees fit today, certain He will not fail. Abide with God this half an hour. God will do the rest.
Your benefit will not be less if you believe that nothing happens. You may not be ready to accept the gain today. Yet sometime, somewhere, it will come to you, nor will you fail to recognize it when it dawns with certainty upon your mind. This half-an-hour will be framed in gold, with every minute like a diamond set around the mirror that this exercise will offer you. And you will see the Beloved’s face upon it, in reflection of your own.
Perhaps today, perhaps tomorrow, you will see your own transfiguration in the glass this holy half-an-hour will hold out to you, to look upon yourself. When you are ready you will find it there, within your mind and waiting to be found. You will remember then the thought to which you gave this half-an-hour, thankfully aware no time was ever better spent.
Perhaps today, perhaps tomorrow, you will look into this glass, and understand the sinless light you see belongs to you; the loveliness you look on is your own. Count this half hour as your gift to God, in certainty that His return will be a sense of love you cannot understand, a joy too deep for you to comprehend, a sight too holy for the body’s eyes to see. And yet you can be sure someday, perhaps today, perhaps tomorrow, you will understand and comprehend and see.
Add further jewels to the golden frame that holds the mirror offered you today, by hourly repeating to yourself:
Let me remember I am one with God,
at one with the world and all within it,
and at one with my Self,
in everlasting holiness and peace.
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Now, it might seem a stretch for some to find similarities between the above text from A Course in Miracles and a song by the Queen of Rock’n’Roll, Tina Turner. But to my ears, mind and heart the similarities are there.
Tina was a practicing Nichiren Buddhist and Buddhism holds that reincarnation is part of the human/spiritual experience. Tina most resolutely explores reincarnation in her 1984 song “I Might Have Been Queen,” but she also does so in her later song “Whatever You Need,” which is about souls coming together in recognition over successive lifetimes.
These souls recognize that only love is ultimately real, and that the sacred source of all things (called “God” my many) is Love. Their ultimate identity is in this Love, a Love that illuminates the truth that we are all one. Moving through life with this truth and the illuminating vision it provides, ensures that, in the words of A Course in Miracles, “everything we touch takes on a shining light that blesses and heals.”
I don’t know about you, but I feel and see that energy of blessing and healing in the video for Tina’s “Whatever You Need.”
In what other lives have I known your kiss?
And what forgotten moments have I felt like this?
The way you touch me, I come undone
You know me more than anyone
Whatever you want
In what other lives have I touched your face?
And what words did we whisper
in a strange forbidden place?
To be with you, is to find myself
We’re two of a kind, you and I
I couldn’t love anyone else
You are my beginning, my end
You are my lover, my friend
In this life, in this time
Whatever you want, whatever you need
I will be right here waiting
Whatever you want
Whatever you need
I will be right here waiting, yeah, yeah, yeah
In what other lives, did I feel your skin?
And when exactly did I breathe you in?
Feel like I’ve known you for a thousand years
You’re so familiar to me and there is no fear
Watch the sun go down, yeah, yeah
My past and future in you are bound, oh yeah
I watch as time moves on, I’m alive and strong
And when I’m with you, there’s no right, no wrong
I experience in the words of this lesson both a guiding light and a healing balm to all that threatens to obscure the holy peace already (and always) deep within me – deep within all of us. It is the peace of the Beloved One, which is my preferred term for God, the Divine Presence at the heart of all things.
As with the previous adaptations of A Course in Miracles that I’ve shared (see here, here, here and here), if the one below resonates with you, feel free to make it even more meaningful by using your preferred images and words – “God,” “Allah,” “Lord,” “Jesus,” “Holy One,” “Great Spirit,” “Father,” “Mother.” . . . I trust they all serve as different pathways leading up the same holy mountain; or, to use another metaphor, different gateways leading inwards to our center, the deepest part of which we all share. For as Henri Nouwen so beautifully reminds us: “In the depths of my being, I meet my fellow humans with whom I share [all things].”
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The present is the only time there is. And so today, this instant, now, we come to look upon what is forever there – not in our sight, but in the vision of the Beloved One, the Source of all things. . . . The senseless busy world fades easily away before this vision. Its sounds grow dim. A melody from far beyond the world increasingly is more and more distinct – an ancient call to which the Source within and beyond gives an ancient answer. You will recognize them both. For they are but your answer to the Beloved’s call to you.
. . . There is a silence into which the world cannot intrude. There is an ancient peace you carry in your heart and have not lost. There is a sense of holiness in you the thought of sin has never touched. All this today you will remember. . . . This is the day when vain imaginings part like a curtain to reveal what lies beyond them. Now is what is really there made visible, while all the shadows which appeared to hide it sink to obscurity. . . . Now will you see it with the eyes of the Beloved. Now is its transformation clear to you.
This day is sacred to the world. Your vision, given you from far beyond all things within the world, looks back on them in a new light. And what you see becomes the healing and salvation of the world. The valuable and valueless are both perceived and recognized for what they are. And what is worthy of your love receives your love, while nothing to be feared remains.
. . . We bless the world as we behold it in the light in which the Beloved One looks on us and offer it the freedom given us through the Beloved’s forgiving vision, now our own. Open the curtain by merely letting go all things you think you want. Your trifling treasures put away and leave a clean and open space within your mind where the Beloved can come and offer you the treasure of transformation. The Beloved One has need of your most holy mind to transform the world.
Is not this purpose worthy to be yours? Is not the Beloved’s vision worthy to be sought above the world’s unsatisfying goals? Let not today slip by without the gifts it holds for you receiving your consent and your acceptance. We can change the world if you acknowledge them.
I’ve previously mentioned that a spiritual resource that many of my Christian patients find meaningful is Sarah Young’s devotional, Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence. It’s a collection of daily reflections written as if Jesus is speaking directly to us. They are words of encouragement, comfort, and reassurance based on Jesus’s own words of hope, guidance, and peace within Scripture.
This book’s readings for today particularly spoke to me. I should also say that I’m drawn to understand and envision the speaker of these words as “the Beloved,” one of any number of names we can use when seeking to describe our experience of the loving and transforming Presence within and beyond all things. These names include “Holy One,” “Divine Presence,” “God,” “Jesus,” “Living Light,” “Great Spirit,” “Sacred Mystery”. . . the list goes on.
Following is my slightly-adapted version of the today's reading from Jesus Calling, a reading that is inspired by Romans 12:2, Hebrews 3:1, and Psalm 105:4.
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I am renewing your mind. When your thoughts flow freely, they tend to move toward perceived problems. Your focus gets snagged on a given problem, circling round and round it in attempts to gain answers and solutions. Your energy is drained away from other matters through this negative focus, Worst of all, you lose sight of Me, your Beloved One.
A renewed mind is Presence-focused. Train your mind to seek Me in every moment, every situation. Sometimes you can find Me in your surroundings: a lilting birdsong, a loved one's smile, golden sunlight. At other times, you must draw inward to find Me. I am always present in your spirit. Seek My Face, speak to Me, and I will light up your mind.
Following is my adaptation of one of Julia Cameron’s “heart steps.”
I open my mind and heart to guidance from the Beloved One. I am open to guidance in all its many forms. I accept help from the Beloved One through people, events, and places which inspire and instruct me. I listen to the song of the Beloved through many instruments – the ebb and flow of the tides, animal companions, the wind, a bird, a flash of sunlight sparkling off colored glass. All things speak my language. I listen to all languages with my heart. My heart hears higher and higher frequencies of guidance as I raise my own thoughts to the possibility of higher realms guiding and embracing my own.
I am grateful
for the Creator’s gifts of abundance
to me and to the world.
The photos in this post – a post dedicated to gratitude – were taken in the garden of my home in Minneapolis, at Wood Lake in Richfield, and at the Prayer Tree by Minnehaha Creek in south Minneapolis.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m feeling overwhelmed and hopeless, I spend time in nature, preferably by water. Here I very consciously cultivate gratitude.
Gratitude for the beauty I seek and see all around me.
Gratitude for the good and meaningful and inspiring people, relationships, and experiences in my life.
And gratitude for the many ways that God, the Soul’s Beloved, invites and draws me into ever deepening relationship, ever greater alignment with the living light of my Beloved’s presence.
I give thanks too for how, when I’m in this place of deep connection and alignment, I am transformed by what I’ve come to call the gifts of God’s abundance. And what are these gifts?
Guiding wisdom, clarity,
peace of heart and mind.
Courage, strength, hope.
Balance, compassion, forgiveness.
I trust that as I am transformed by these gifts, the world is transformed. This is because when I’m in that place of deep connection and alignment, I am not only one with God and my deepest, truest Self, but also with all of creation, with every person on the planet.
This is because the Divine Presence within all things is, in the words of Matthew Fox, “the pattern that connects.” The wholeness of this loving presence, says A Course in Miracles, “is the power holding everything as one” (Lesson 127). Because of this divine oneness, Henri Nouwen was able to write: “In the depths of my being, I meet my fellow humans with whom I share [all things].”
And so at least once a day I take a sacred pause, go to that place of deep connection and alignment, open myself to God’s gifts of abundance, and trust that this all makes a difference. A difference not only in my own life but also in the troubled world around me.
For all of this I say to the Beloved . . .
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Writes Gregory Jantz . . .
Why should we make a habit of regularly experiencing and expressing gratitude? Because simply put, gratitude fosters optimism, and optimism fuels hope. And hope is what gives us the strength to keep moving forward on even our darkest days. That’s why it’s hard to imagine more effective soul medicine than gratitude – it’s impossible to feel grateful and hopeless at the same time!
Granted, sometimes when we’re really struggling, gratitude can be hard to muster. So start with the small things. Anyone can come up with those – and the more whimsical, the better. For example, I’m grateful for ice cream and for the inspired genius who invented it. I’m grateful that freshly mown grass is part of my world on summer evenings. I’m grateful for how it smells and how it feels on bare feet. I’m even grateful for rainy days, because I love the way the air smells after a storm passes. As you have your daily conversations with God, make a habit of thanking God for something that brings you joy.
The medieval Christian philosopher and mystic Meister Eckhart once said, “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” And if you think about it, the list of things we can and should be thankful for – even in our darkest moments – is practically inexhaustible. So say thank you – out loud and with gusto – for teriyaki sauce or butterflies or kites or Mozart . . . anything that has ever made you smile. Say thank you for hot showers and soft towels. . . . For tulips poking out of the dirt in the spring and that magic moment when the lights go down in the movie theater.
The wonderful thing about gratitude is that it is a multiplier – not of the beauty and good all around us in the world (that never changes) but of our awareness of it and of the loving God responsible for it all. When dark thoughts threaten to push everything else aside, practicing purposeful gratitude to our Creator is a powerful way to push back.
Beloved One, who loves me unconditionally with all the wild love and affection of the universal heart, help me now.
I trust in my own heart wisdom and the truth of your love for me. Help me to trust in the flow of life, to let go of my fixed plans and ideas, and to open up to the genius of love itself.
May I realize that my destiny
will unfold with absolute perfection.
And may I trust in the signs
I am given.
May I be able to release any false guidance based in fear, and may I open up instead to genuine guidance and inner knowing based in love.
Images: Syrian-born dancer Ahmad Joudeh, whose autobiography is entitled Dance or Die. Ahmad dedicates his memoir “to the spirit that guides every single one of us, in the memory of the soul, where the flame is, our spirits glow.”
I turn 59 today, and as has long been the tradition at The Wild Reed, I mark the occasion of my birthday by sharing a song, prayer and/or reflection that I find particularly meaningful; that says something about where I’m at on my journey and what’s most on my heart and mind.*
This year I’ve decided to share a song by singer-songwriter Loreena McKennitt, whose music I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing twice in concert, both times at the State Theatre in downtown Minneapolis – once in 1994 (my first year in the U.S.) and more recently last November with my friend Andrea (left). The song I share today is “Never-ending Road (Amhrán Duit),” from Loreena’s 2006 album An Ancient Muse.
I chose this song because I wanted something that returns me to what I know to be loving and true about both my own life and the shared life of humanity. I’m very much feeling the need for such grounding, especially given the profoundly troubling times we’re living through. They are times of genocide and a multitude of other forms of violence, of rapidly approaching climate catastrophe, and the undermining of democratic ideals and norms by both ongoing neoliberalism and rising fascism. And here in the U.S., I’m not alone in experiencing disheartenment and stress due to a presidential race dominated by two candidates dedicated to genocide, the “war machine” and oligarchy (hallmarks, it should be said, of the declining American empire).
I find myself daily needing to make time to quieten and still my mind so as to connect through prayer and/or silent meditation with the Divine Presencewithin and around me; to align with the Living Light of this presence and allow myself to be a conduit of its transforming love through my words and actions. I trust that this makes a difference, a positive difference, both in my life and in the world.
For me, Loreena McKennitt’s “Never-ending Road (Amhrán Duit)” brings to mind and heart all of these spiritual understandings and experiences I’ve come to trust. It does so through lyrics that reflect the two deepest of these understandings/experiences – the journey and the Beloved.
Years ago I described my spiritual journey as “spiralling forward with focus, direction, and energy.” I very consciously chose spiralling as I think it describes well the nature and trajectory of my journey. There’s often something circular, cyclical about it; yet I nevertheless discern and experience progress, a forward momentum. I also appreciate how spiralling brings to mind the graceful and focused movements of the whirling dervishes of the Sufi tradition, a mystic tradition with which I deeply resonate.
A hallmark of my journey to date is my ever-deepening embodiment of the mystic’s response to God as “the Beloved,” a response found within a range of mystical traditions – Christian, Sufi, Jewish – and one that often has erotic, including homo-erotic, overtones. I’m drawn to this type of universality, though to be sure, it’s a catholicity of religion rather than of church.
It’s also a universality reflected in “Never-ending Road (Amhrán Duit),” and one which Loreena acknowledges when talking about the song in the liner notes of An Ancient Muse.
No paticular time or place can be pinpointed as the inspiration of this piece. Instead, it has been one that has evolved over many years of reading the works of many poets, mystics from across the religious traditions, who sought to reflect the divine through love poetry: Rumi, Hafiz, Yunus Emre, Solomon ibn Gabirol, St. John of the Cross, St. Teresa of Ávila. The universal theme is one of love, and in this never-ending road of life and rebirth, surely this is the sentiment that must endure.
The road now leads onward ~ As far as can be
Winding lanes ~ And hedgerows in threes
By purple mountains ~ And round every bend
All roads lead to you ~ There is no journey’s end
Here is my heart, I give it to you
Take me with you across this land
These are my dreams, so simple and few
Dreams we hold in the palm of our hands
Deep in the winter ~ Amidst falling snow
High in the air ~ Where the bells they all toll
And now all around me ~ I feel you still here
Such is the journey ~ No mystery to fear
It now leads onward ~ I know not where
I feel in my heart ~ That you will be there
Whenever a storm comes ~ Whatever our fears
The journey goes on ~ With your love ever near
* As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, it’s somewhat of a tradition to mark my birthday here at The Wild Reed by sharing a song or prayer or reflection that I find particularly meaningful. On my 44th birthday, for instance, I shared Stephan Gately’s performance of “No Matter What,” and when I turned 45 I shared “Where the Truth Lies” by the band Exchange.
In 2012, when I turned 47, I shared a prayer for balance at a very trying time, not only for myself, but for many of us here in Minnesota.
Seven years ago, on the first day of my fiftieth year, I shared a “guidepost on the journey,” and then one year later on the day of my 50th birthday, I shared Buffy Sainte-Marie’s rousing “It’s My Way.”
In 2017, when I turned 52, I shared a poem by John O’Donohue; while on my 53rd birthday I shared “Love Is,” a beautiful meditation on the mystery of love by my favorite male vocalist Carl Anderson.
The year I turned 54 I shared “This Is the Time,” a beautiful song by Senegalese singer-songwriter and multi-instrumentalist Daby Touré, and when I turned 55 it was Black’s “Wonderful Life” that encapsulated much of what I found myself experiencing at that time.
When I turned 56 I shared Dusty Springfield’s reflective recording “Home to Myself,” while on my 57th birthday I explored some “deeper understandings” via Kiki Dee and Carmelo Luggeri’s rousing song “The Long Ride Home.”
I dedicate this post to all who are struggling to let go of things in their lives that are holding them back and keeping them down.
I also dedicate it to all who struggle to start (or continue) both the inner and outer work of healing, be it from addiction, trauma, any and all forms of abuse, false expectations, the effects of poor choices, past mistakes that haunt and debilitate, and/or the scourge of low self-esteem.
May strength, peace, and healing flow from this post to all who need them.
. . . My heart is so open,
and my soul is out there
in the most vulnerable state,
so true and so pure.
I give myself to you, sweating my tears
and offering my wounds for you to heal.
My Beloved, I am all ready for you,
body and soul, past and present,
accepting your transforming love
and embracing it.
Song “Ya Malikan” written and performed by Midist/Wasim. Dance choreographed and performed by Ahmad Joudeh.
I established The Wild Reed in 2006 as a sign of solidarity with all who are dedicated to living lives of integrity – though, in particular, with gay people seeking to be true to both the gift of their sexuality and their Catholic faith. The Wild Reed's original by-line read, “Thoughts and reflections from a progressive, gay, Catholic perspective.” As you can see, it reads differently now. This is because my journey has, in many ways, taken me beyond, or perhaps better still, deeper into the realities that the words “progressive,” “gay,” and “Catholic” seek to describe.
Even though reeds can symbolize frailty, they may also represent the strength found in flexibility. Popular wisdom says that the green reed which bends in the wind is stronger than the mighty oak which breaks in a storm. Tall green reeds are associated with water, fertility, abundance, wealth, and rebirth. The sound of a reed pipe is often considered the voice of a soul pining for God or a lost love.
On September 24, 2012,Michael BaylyofCatholics for Marriage Equality MNwas interviewed by Suzanne Linton of Our World Today about same-sex relationships and why Catholics can vote 'no' on the proposed Minnesota anti-marriage equality amendment.
"I believe your blog to be of utmost importance for all people regardless of their orientation. . . . Thank you for your blog and the care and dedication that you give in bringing the TRUTH to everyone."– William
"Michael, if there is ever a moment in your day or in your life when you feel low and despondent and wonder whether what you are doing is anything worthwhile, think of this: thanks to your writing on the internet, a young man miles away is now willing to embrace life completely and use his talents and passions unashamedly to celebrate God and his creation. Any success I face in the future and any lives I touch would have been made possible thanks to you and your honesty and wisdom."– AB
"Since I discovered your blog I have felt so much more encouraged and inspired knowing that I'm not the only gay guy in the Catholic Church trying to balance my Faith and my sexuality. Continue being a beacon of hope and a guide to the future within our Church!"– Phillip
"Your posts about Catholic issues are always informative and well researched, and I especially appreciate your photography and the personal posts about your own experience. I'm very glad I found your blog and that I've had the chance to get to know you."– Crystal
"Thank you for taking the time to create this fantastic blog. It is so inspiring!"– George
"I cannot claim to be an expert on Catholic blogs, but from what I've seen, The Wild Reed ranks among the very best."– Kevin
"Reading your blog leaves me with the consolation of knowing that the words Catholic, gay and progressive are not mutually exclusive.."– Patrick
"I grieve for the Roman institution’s betrayal of God’s invitation to change. I fear that somewhere in the midst of this denial is a great sin that rests on the shoulders of those who lead and those who passively follow. But knowing that there are voices, voices of the prophets out there gives me hope. Please keep up the good work."– Peter
"I ran across your blog the other day looking for something else. I stopped to look at it and then bookmarked it because you have written some excellent articles that I want to read. I find your writing to be insightful and interesting and I'm looking forward to reading more of it. Keep up the good work. We really, really need sane people with a voice these days."– Jane Gael
"Michael, your site is like water in the desert."– Jayden
